Twenty Ways to Make a good Marriage Great

This came from a member of the LDS church, but I think it has very good points for everyone- no matter your religious beliefs. Nothing bad would come from incorporating these things into our relationships - Only good! So, why not try?

By Richard W. Linford

1. Night and Morning Prayer … to say thanks, to ask for help in your marriage and family, to worship together.

2. A Weekly Planning Meeting … to discuss the calendar, talk over needs and problems, decide priorities and next steps. (Write decisions in a journal, including goals and discussion topics, and reasons for each.)

3. A Daily Phone Call or Personal Conversation … to say “I love you,” to touch base, to discuss the day, to show you care.

4. A Weekly Date … to a favorite park, a concert, the library, the gym; or staying home for a candlelight dinner, a game, or a mutual hobby.

5. Patience Regardless … of missed meals, tardiness, forgotten favors, a thoughtless remark, impatience.

6. Daily Service … helping with house or yard work, mending a piece of clothing, taking a turn with the sick baby, fixing a favorite meal. (Write it down. Do it!)

7. A Budget … to tie down income and expenses, help set financial goals, and give you control over your finances.

8. Listening … not only to what is said, but also to what is meant.

9. Regular Attendance … at church—and where possible—the temple.

10. Daily Scripture Reading … to learn the gospel, to receive inspiration for yourself and your marriage, to become more like Jesus.

11. Working Together … caring for a garden, painting a bedroom, washing the car, scrubbing floors, building a piece of furniture, writing a poem together, team teaching a class.

12. Forgiving Each Other … always learning from each other, trying a different way, being the first to make peace.

13. Courtesies … like saying please and thank you, not interrupting or belittling, not doing all the talking, continuing the niceties of courtship.

14. Soft and Kind Words … of tenderness, compassion, empathy.

15. Learning Together by … reading to each other, discussing ideas, taking a class.

16. Respecting … opinions, ideas, privacy.

17. Supporting Your Spouse’s … Church callings and righteous goals.

18. Caring for Your Spouse’s Family by … enjoying their company, praying for them, serving them, overlooking differences.

19. Occasional Gifts … such as a note, a needed item—but mostly gifts of time and self.

20. Loving with All Your Heart. “Thou shalt love thy wife [thy husband] with all thy heart, and shalt cleave unto her [him] and none else.” (D&C 42:22.)

Richard W. Linford, father of eight children and an operational auditor, is bishop of the East Millcreek Utah 11th Ward.

I just think that this list could do so much good on marriages and relationships we we all stop being so selfish, and really try to do these things with our spouse, for our spouse, and for the good of our families! What peace it could bring to our homes!
I really hope someone out there will read this and try incorporating at least one idea into their everyday life. I know I will be!

Hi, My name is...

Hi, my name is Jamie, and I'm addicted to food.

I know it's a weird thing to write a blog post about.

But I need to.

I need to show someone I love that they aren't the only person who suffers with addiction. I need this person to know that some of us also know how hard it is Every Single Moment to keep ourselves in control. I want them to know that I honestly believe we can overcome these addictions easier by sticking together, by checking in with each other, and having someone to help hold us accountable for our actions. We have to be honest with ourselves and others 100% of the time. No hiding. No cover ups. Keep it out in the open. Don't do anything that you'd be ashamed of telling your spouse. Or your mother. Or your best friend. Or a complete stranger.

Yesterday I ate 5 or 6 cookies. When no one was around to see me do it. And I feel like crud about it. But I'm telling you now. And I'm promising that I want to be better. I want to stop hiding while I eat. I want to be able to sit right in front of my children and not be ashamed of what I've eaten that day. Because I don't want them to be like me. I want them to be healthy. I want them to eat healthy food AND have healthy eating habits.

I honestly think some people just have an addictive streak. I'm no scientist, or doctor. I haven't done any research. But I think many of us are born with the ability to easily become addicted. And it just depends on what we have in our lives. I don't drink or smoke. But if I did - I'd probably become addicted. I don't do much exercise- but many years ago when i did - I started to become addicted to it. At this point it my life, I have food. And it is what I spend a majority of my time thinking about, or wanting.

I think we can all help each other if we stop hiding. Stop pretending nothings wrong. Stop thinking we are the only one in the world, or in our social circles, or in our family with this problem. With an addiction.

So I'm asking for a favor. Will you tell me what your addicted to and work with me to change? I mean really, honestly, for life - change?

Food? Drugs? Alcohol? Shopping? Computer? Exercise? Games? Porn? Tanning? Reading?

Some addictions don't seem as bad as others. Right now, I'm kinda wishing it was exercise I was addicted to. But any addiction can be unhealthy if left unchecked. When you neglect people/parts of your life because of an addiction - I think something's wrong. And we need to get it under control.

Please help me. Help me show this person that they aren't alone in this recovery process. I want to change myself. And I want this person to change too. Before something happens to their life that they can't fix. Please help me.

*If you're worried about legal ramifications of posting your name with your addiction fee free to do it anonymously.

A run for my money!

You know those child safety locks they make for cupboard doors? Well the last few days have proven to me quite how important those locks are.
On Friday, Gordon got into a craft cupboard in our kitchen, and shattered a large glass jar on the floor. I was sitting about 5 ft away from him and didn't stop him in time... He was covered in glass so i grabbed him and headed for the tub, while yelling to Madi to follow me because the kitchen wasn't safe. I got Gordon all rinsed off (without ANY cuts!) and Madi came in and showed me a tiny spot of blood on the top of her foot. She hadn't followed me, but had gone straight to the glass and WALKED through IT! As i put Gordon in the playpen I heard the CAT walking through the glass too!! So I had to grab her and rinse off tons of glass from her little paws too! (Oh she wasn't to thrilled to be in the water.) I locked the cat in my bedroom and rinsed Madi off too. She had one tiny cut on the top of her foot, from one of the larger pieces of glass that her foot went under, while walking through it.
All three of them were screaming from the corners of the house that I banished them to while I swept, and cleaned, and vacuumed, and swept some more.
What a nightmare!

That was Friday.

On Saturday evening while I was getting ready for a temple trip (standing at my bathroom vanity) Gordon got into the cupboard under my sink, found a large watch battery (about the size of a nickle) and Swallowed it! I was standing right next to him, Talking to him, I never saw him with the battery! (And WHAT was it don't in that cupboard?!?)
I had taken something else out of his hand from the cupboard and was taking him out of the room when I saw the empty battery package on the floor and he was gagging a little bit.
The biggest problem was that I didn't know if there had been a battery in the package before he got to it.
We didn't do anything about it right away.. he was acting normal and I had convinced myself that the package had been empty... But I couldn't stop worrying.
This morning I took him to the ER and had an x-ray done.


And there's his battery! It's laying sideways, so you can't see that it's a round, nickle size watch battery. But there it is!
Luckily the Doctor says it seems to be 'moving through' just fine and we should see it again in the next 24 hours.. We just need to watch him closely, and make sure he doesn't show any signs of it getting stuck. If he does we'll have to rush back in for more x-rays (or do the same if it's not out within the week) and have it removed surgically.

So, the moral of these two "bad mommy" stories? Don't procrastinate putting on safety locks!!!! Even if your 1st child never seemed to be interested in cupboards.. you don't want to find out the hard way that the 2nd child IS interested.

The first Birthday photo

Sorry for the poor quality photo, but just giving you a sneak peak (from my phone's camera) of the cute little Birthday boy!!
(and yes, he really did keep that hat on for almost an hour!)

It's Been a year?!

First of all, HAPPY BIRTHDAY little G!!
I can't believe it's already been a year! I know that sounds really cliche, but I swear - that was the fastest year ever! Peanuts first year didn't even go this fast, wow!

Today started out pretty mellow, with normal "at home routine" except that the Birthday boy actually tried to sleep in! His big sissy came down to my room this morning about 7:30a and when I asked her to go upstairs to get dressed, "and do it quietly because your brother is still sleeping", she must have heard me say "go wake up your brother because he is still sleeping." Ha! She ran upstairs and burst into his room yelling! AH! I don't know why, but at least he was a good sport about it.
Anyway, after picking Sissy up from school, we took a ride on the local carousal! They both loved it, but I think the birthday boy was still a little sleepy - he spent the whole ride quietly clingy to the pole of the giraffe he was sitting on. We also bought him a suit so he has some pretty nice threads for church now!
After a yummy lunch and an imaginary nap (not sure why he didn't sleep - he usually does so well) we had some friends come over for playtime and cupcakes!
His reaction to his cupcake was totally unexpected! Especially for how much he Loves to put Everything into his mouth before even looking at it! He was very interested in it while we sang Happy Birthday to him, and immediately grabbed a handful of "frosting" aka whipped cream(less sugar). He then tried to wipe it off his hand... he picked it up, looked at it, but didn't seem to like the big mess it was making. I even tried to feed him a bite and he shook his head "no" at me! I had to shove my whipped cream cover finger in his mouth to show him that yes, it was yummy! He wanted me to feed it to him because of the mess it made when he touched it. It was pretty cute! I did get a video of all this, but I'm not sure how to upload it. I'll also get the photos uploaded to show his cute messy face! :)
We had a great time, and are So glad that Jena and her kids came over to spend the evening with us! Now only if daddy could have been here! Maybe we'll have a redo-party with him later... :)


Oh, and I wanted to post some things I love about My little Man...
I love the way I'm guaranteed snuggles every time I get him out of bed, or lay his blankie across my shoulder when holding him, even if it's only for 2 seconds.
I love the way he points at everything he likes, especially when he hears his sissy's voice but can't see her - he points to where the sound came from.
I love when he uses his sign for "all done".
I love when he folds his arms over and over again, even if he refuses to do it when we are actually praying.
I love his way-to-shaggy, but way-to-cute hair!
I love that he never gets tired of peek-a-boo.
I love that he has discovered his "cheese" face and scrunches up his nose when he makes it.
I love his dimple on his cheek.
I love his bright blue eyes.
I love that he tries to share his paci with me.
I love to watch him, watch birds. They are one of the most fascinating things in the world to him.
I love how much he loves baths! It's the best time of day, and he crawls straight to the tub any chance he gets.
I love that when he's tired, or just lovey he grabs my hand and rests his head in it... even when it means I have to push the shopping cart around the store with one hand while he 'loves' the other one.
I love that he has taught his sissy that life really isn't to busy for snuggles, and I get them from both kids daily.
okay.. I really could go on and on and on.. but i think you all probably get the idea. I LOVE MY LITTLE MAN!! I really can't believe how happy he makes me! Happy Birthday Bubba!

a little FYI for the Friends and Fam

Some of you may have noticed that I've been using a lot of nicknames, or nonspecific names in my blog posts lately. Just an fyi, we've decided to no longer use the kiddos names on the blog when it is open to the public to view. This may seem odd to those of you who just get all the posts in email form, but We feel a little better this way.
Oh and if you are seeing the blog, and you notice the "birthday tickers" on the right side of our page... Our little Girl has been nicknamed Ladybug Girl, from one of her favorite books, and her little brother has become Lyle the Crocodile, from another beloved book.
I know this is random, but sometimes - we can be a bit paranoid. I also know it isn't fool proof, but it's a start. :)

Happy Birthday Peanut!!

We had a fun, but mellow Birthday today for our little peanut! I can't believe she is already 3 years old!
Just a quick run down of her special day:

She got a new birthday dress and "Birthday Girl!" button to wear all day, and was Very excited about it!
She was able to take carrot cake cupcakes ( her fav) to school today to share with all of her friends, and had a ton of fun playing Birthday games and being sung to!
She got to stay up with mommy during her brothers naptime, watch her favorite movie(Cinderella) AND eat popcorn!
She got to pick what we ate for dinner, two nights in a row. last night she picked pancakes, tonight she wanted a cheeseburger and apples from McDonald's... which I was a little worried about, but I think she just remembered that it means dinner comes with a toy.
After brother went to bed, mommy and daddy sung to her and she blew the candles out on her cupcake/birthday cake. Which she then did 3 more times, "just because".
At the end of the day was her "big reveal" of her new bedroom, and a few extra gifts that mommy just had to give :) For anyone who doesn't know, we painted her walls pink (very pink), bought her a bed frame, & new bedding (she picked out a few months ago & then forgot about it) and we put a desk in her room that had her presents on it... I have more plans for the decor, but ran out of time for her birthday. It'll come eventually...
We all LOVE her new bedroom, especially the bedding! Brother and Kitty tested it out while she was at school to make sure it was all right and up to par. :)

Oh, and the present she liked the most? It is actually the Only thing she asked for, all by herself, no prompting, and completely out of the blue... a Stethoscope. Instead of getting a plastic toy, we got a inexpensive, but Real one and she LOVES IT!! She kept listening to our heartbeats, taking turns between "who wants to be next" as she put it, and between each turn, she would flip the stethoscope around the back of her neck like doctors do. She even tried to listen to the kitties heartbeat but kitty was purring to loud to hear it :)

Now, I had great plans to show off all kinds of cute photos from the day, but alas, we are having problems with the memory card that was used.... I'm Extremely Sad to think I might not get any of these photos back.. but We're still working on it! I'll post them the minute I can get it to work... Or if nothing else, i have a couple poor quality snaps from my cell phone camera I can try to load later. :)